As a paediatrician specialising in the care of children who have been sexually abused, I am well aware of sexual harm that occurs in school settings by peers (Editorial 5 October). This is just one aspect of the wider issue of children and young people who sexually harm other children and young people.
Of all the children my organisation cares for, 30% are harmed by other children – data we shared with the children’s commissioner in their report in 2023 on the impact of pornography on harmful sexual behaviour on children.
The solutions go way beyond the three tools described in your editorial (the promotion of sex and relationships education, online safety laws and improving criminal justice). Children need to be raised in family units, however defined, and wider societies that are emotionally available to them (and be helped to achieve this). They need to be curious about their life and experiences, their voices valued, equality promoted and inequality called out across the genders in all settings. This needs a state that supports parents and carers from before birth; community role models of all genders, cultures and ethnicities; trusted adults in safe and available spaces; and education (not limited to school settings) that promotes empathy for others, critical thinking and takes a whole schools or systems approach to this.
Recently, two of the young people I cared for who claimed that they were sexually harmed by other young people had their cases heard in court. In both, the outcome was not guilty. I am sure that the girls still believe their truth – that they were raped – and the boys still believe their truth, that the sex that occurred was voluntary.
I doubt the criminal justice process and outcome has helped either the girls or the boys to begin to understand and empathise with the others’ “truth”. Instead, I suspect that the message received was that someone was “right” and someone was “wrong” – or worse, “lying”. Harmful sexual behaviour by children to other children deserves more thinking, nuance, compassion and care than that.
Name and address supplied
The Guardian is right to highlight that schools cannot tackle child sexual abuse alone. Children absorb messages about relationships and sex from far beyond the classroom. Social media, pornography, AI-generated content, peers and influencers are increasingly shaping children’s environments. Intervention after harm has occurred is essential, but it is not enough. Schools have a critical preventative role through high-quality, evidence-informed relationships, sex and health education.
This starts well before adolescence. In primary school, children need to learn about boundaries, bodily autonomy, respect, empathy and how to recognise behaviour that makes them uncomfortable. These foundations can then develop into learning about consent, healthy relationships, coercion, pornography, online harms and sexual harassment in secondary school.
Families, schools, technology companies, policymakers and wider society all have responsibilities. But giving children the knowledge, language and confidence to understand healthy relationships and challenge harmful behaviour is a fundamental safeguarding tool. Safeguarding cannot only begin when something has gone wrong. Prevention has to be part of the answer.
Donna Hill
Head of Coram SCARF
