The case of the dog that didn’t bark in the night. Sometimes prime minister’s questions are as notable for the topics that the leader of the opposition doesn’t ask about as for the ones she does. So you have to assume Kemi Badenoch now realises she was on the wrong side of public opinion on the weekend’s protests and the government’s decision to impose sanctions on Israeli illegal settlements.
I guess it’s hard to be too vocal when you fundamentally agree with the rioters. And maybe she has noticed that many of her own party are a little queasy about Palestinian land being seized and people being killed. And no reaction from the US about the sanctions.
Instead, Kemi chose to rehash last week’s questions on defence. It didn’t end well then, and it didn’t end well now. Rather, it exposed Kemi’s fundamental limitations. She appears to have been blindsided by Andy Burnham’s self-invention as Mr Reasonable. The man who listens to the questions and attempts to give an honest answer. Often at great length. The man who repeatedly asks her to step back from point-scoring and invites her to work with him.
This is a problem for the Conservative leader. Not only does she have an inability to work with anyone, her whole shtick is point-scoring. She lives for division. Against Keir Starmer this didn’t seem to matter so much, but Burnham’s more open affability exposes her as an opportunist.
She has no real investment in the questions she asks. They are only a means to an end. A chance to expose some weakness in the government. Kemi isn’t really bothered if people go homeless or we don’t spend 3% of GDP on defence as she is going to be OK either way. In fact she would rather the country fell apart as she has more chance of getting into Downing Street that way. Bring it on. She hadn’t gone in to politics to problem solve. Her goal was her own career development.
Burnham had started the session by mentioning that Friday would mark the 25th anniversary of 9/11. A turning point in global history. Though not apparently for Kemi. Let’s try to be generous. She was only 21 at the time and even more solipsistic than she is now. So perhaps she has never heard of it. Just a little difficulty local to NYC.
Either way, Kemi didn’t feel the need to add any condolences of her own to the families affected. Many of whom were British. She also missed out on her chance to congratulate Donald Trump for his efforts. In recent days, the US president has taken to reimagining himself as one of the great heroes of the terrorist attack. A man who rose from the ashes of the twin towers. Even though he wasn’t there. I still find it amazing that Trump’s fantasies are so readily indulged. No one seems that bothered by his lies. Maybe it’s the true American dream. Anyone can be whatever they want to be.
You had to assume Kemi was focused on defence mainly because she couldn’t come up with anything else. So what we got was the leader of the opposition on repeat. Living in her own echo chamber. Could the government get to 3% of GDP by 2030? Andy looked vaguely surprised to have time travelled back a week and he clearly didn’t have any of the answers in his folder. A couple of times he searched in vain for something new to say, before getting thoroughly pissed off and chucking the folder on the floor.
So the old answers would have to do. Read my lips. It was a bit of a cheek for the Tories to complain about defence when they had repeatedly hollowed out the budget but he would give it a go. The chancellor had been picked precisely because he could be trusted to deliver 3.5% by 2035. But the government wouldn’t be doing a trade off between national security and social security. The Tories’ plan to cut housing benefits by £4bn to fund defence were brain dead as they would only be adding to the number of homeless people for whom councils would have to provide accommodation.
Burnham would not compromise on either national security or essential welfare budgets. The money would come from elsewhere. But the Tories would have to be patient and wait for both the budget and the strategic defence review. That’s if we had that long. There had just been a report that AI might wipe out humanity inside 10 years. Run for the hills everyone.
Perhaps Kemi could try yoga or get a massage to help her chill out in the meantime. But she was too far gone for that. The more affable, the more consensual – “we can do this together, Kemi. Honest” – Mr Congeniality became, the more Kemi looked like she was on the point of losing it. She can bear anything but kindness.
Come the final question and Kemi’s immense surprise that a billionaire had chosen to seek out a tax haven – who would have believed such a thing? – Burnham had the floor to himself. Kemi had teed things up by both accusing him of being a new government and a continuation of the old one –er … make your mind up – which gave him the space to emphasise the difference between himself and Starmer.
This was the moment Andy had been waiting for all morning. What he had come prepared for. If you’re going to be picky, then it was also a bit self-righteous. There again, how often does a prime minister get to be on the right side of history. His chance to say that imposing sanctions on Israeli settlements had been the moral choice. It was only right to expect higher standards of your friends than your enemies. You don’t give your mates a free pass to kill people. To back him up, it wasn’t just most of the Tory party who were with him. It was France, Canada and nine other countries.
There was one more thing that didn’t get a mention. That was Reform’s local difficulties with the Met widening an investigation into its party funding. This was yet another break from Starmer. Keir always used to make a point of calling out Reform and Nige and co used to love the attention. Burnham’s approach has been to freeze Reform out. To ignore them completely. And it seems to be working so far. To be ignored is a fate worse than death.
